Point of interest: Regardless of whether your main database server is Pervasive.SQL or MS_SQL, your MaxExchange remotes are always Pervasive.SQL databases.
I have heard from others that very large refresh packets can cause problems. You might want to start by creating a small refresh packet, then mark your records and send them over to the remote in batches to keep the packet sizes down.
re: Renaming the database directory - not directly, but there is a workaround. Check out the topic entitled "Moving an Address Book" in Maximizer's help file.